When we are able to fully and unconditionally accept ourselves, the next step is to completely and unconditionally like and love ourselves. This means that as soon as you become aware of your own existence, you will unconsciously smile because you genuinely like yourself. This liking is unconditional. You don’t need to imagine, “Oh, I have this position, or I have this knowledge.” That kind of love is not true love; it’s just excitement at the mental level—the excitement of the self. Even though you may think, “I am knowledgeable, I am accomplished,” at the same time, you’re also thinking about how the outside world perceives your knowledge and achievements. “Will I appear more respectable? Will I be recognized by others? Will I be better than others?” This is the excitement at the mental level, what we call the self.

True unconditional love is when, as soon as you become aware of your existence, you unconsciously feel joy and smile. There are no images, no imagination—just simple, direct love. When we can love ourselves, your children, your subordinates, and everyone around you will feel it. First, you have fully accepted them. When you accept them, they can feel it. For example, when your child makes a mistake, they can openly tell you without fear of being judged. This is when they feel fully accepted.

Your children no longer need to worry, “What if I don’t do well in school? What if I can’t find a job? What if I’m not good enough? Will I embarrass my parents?” They no longer need to think about these things because they only sense your unconditional acceptance.

Some parents only try to accept their children when they have problems—perhaps when they’re sick or dealing with severe mental health issues like depression. But this is not true acceptance. It comes from helplessness. It is a compromise. It is an attempt to help the child recover by “accepting” them, but this acceptance has a utilitarian purpose. It is not truly unconditional. True acceptance means that, even if your child remains the same forever, you can still accept them. Only when you reach this point will they truly open their hearts to you. Once their hearts open, your love will gradually seep through. They will see the gap and understand that love is like this. Slowly, they will want to fill their own hearts with love because they want to learn from you and wish to become someone who can give love to others.

Only then will they begin to cultivate their inner selves and strive to be a loving person. Their words, actions, and learning will revolve around having more love in their hearts. This is the concept of “love the people and govern the country.” “Can it be done without action? Can it be done through inaction?” These are beautiful theories, but the real question is how to accept yourself unconditionally, how to love yourself unconditionally, and how to make your child feel unconditionally accepted and loved. These are concrete practices.

What specific practices should you follow? Stay tuned for our upcoming courses. Thank you!

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